5 Months with Ellie

Talking changes/development
We are still getting some additional noises and it seems like her cries are starting to change over from the infant screaming to be less hysterical (at times).  She is getting better core strength and can sit in an exersaucer with a little help from a pillow propped behind her.  She can sit in the bumbo seat 
for a little while without getting fussy.  

She is starting to outgrow some of her earlier items like the swing and the rock n play, which is good because we don't have room for the old items plus the new ones to be out at the same time!  She is grasping and reaching for things now and can hold onto toys for a lot longer than she used to.  She has started to hold on to her bottle and can grasp it for about 10 seconds at a time before it falls, I feel like she will have it down by 6 months and may be able to feed herself then, crazy!

Smiles and giggling are the norm now instead of the exception.  I love seeing her so happy!

Working Mom

I had previously written about my struggle to work from home 2 days a week while caring for Ellie.  Well it got to the point where I just said "this isn't working" and I asked my boss to move to a reduced hours schedule.  3 out of 4 weeks a month I work a 27 hour week and the 1 week of the month end close ( I am a financial accountant) I work the full week.  I am not psyched about getting less pay (I will get 80% of my current salary) but I will definitely cherish the days I am home with Ellie and don't have to worry about work.  I think this will be a good thing for our family too because I can do the errands on those days that we don't have time for during the week/weekends.  It will be a challenge that I have to tell people "not I can't make that meeting because I don't work Tuesdays/Fridays" I just hope people respect my schedule.  

Sleep

As I mentioned above has outgrown her rock n play, so we have moved her over to sleeping in her crib soon.  It has been a bit touch and go with the crib because she slept so well in the rock n play and now she is waking up at least once a night.

A week ago she had some sleep regression - one night she woke up at 1 am then 4:45 am then up per normal at 6:15 am.  The next night she woke up at 11:45 pm, the next night at 4 am and for now she is back to her normal schedule.  She has actually started to want to go to bed earlier, so I try to put her to sleep sometime between 7-7:30 pm.  I always wondered how I would know when to start to put her to bed earlier, but there is no doubt when the fussing starts that it is bed time!  I try to put her to bed as soon as she rubs her eyes for the first time and that usually helps to ward off a crying meltdown.  Brian and I have been switching off putting her to bed (it used to just be his job).  But I had to work late a few days and it was the only time i got to see her at night so I gladly took on the task.  Then Brian had to travel to Baltimore for a few nights so I did it then too.  Then he cut his finger and had to get 4 stitches so I am still putting her to bed :)  I don't mind doing it.  Sometimes I nurse her to sleep, which I am sure all the books say is a no no at this age, but I like doing it and she doesn't have to have it that way every night so I assume it is ok!

Just this past week we have started to let her "cry it out." when going to bed and for some naps.  It isn't easy, but the first night was the worst and now she usually falls asleep after about 10 minutes of crying. 

Feeding

At her 4 month appointment the pediatrician mentioned trying to introduce some rice cereal within the next month.  My first thought was "no way my baby is too young for that" but then I realized in a month she will be almost 6 months old!  It has been so easy so far just giving her breast milk only - I didn't have to think about other options, so this will definitely be a change. I need to get things like spoons and she will have to start wearing bibs!

Body

I have achieved (for now) what my husband refers to as "high school skinny" which means I am down to a weight I haven't been at since high school.  It is nice and makes me want to continue breastfeeding until Ellie is 10 years old so I get the additional calorie burning benefits ;)  I am a little afraid once I stop breastfeeding I will put some weight back on, but we will cross that bridge once it comes!


I haven't been great about going for runs, but I do go for 2 long walks a day with the stroller and Winnie on the days I am home (which is 4 days a week) now that the weather is nice so I think that is good enough exercise for the time being.  


Since I am burning a lot of calories breastfeeding I don't find it super necessary to go back to my old running schedule of 3-5 miles at a time. I think that would cause my body a bit of strain right now since I still losing weight from breastfeeding alone. 

Feelings/thoughts
My best friend told me a few weeks ago that she is pregnant and I am super excited. I miss being pregnant and I am excited to watch her belly grow and tell her my experiences with being pregnant and having a newborn.  I hope she has a girl so that Ellie and her can be best friends too!  

Pictures!  So I tried to do a Easter photo shoot a week before Easter and it did not turn out so good...

 

Luckily we tried again Easter morning with better results! 

 I think she enjoyed the white bow and black shoes better!

My sister in law dropped off a box of my niece's clothes that she has outgrown so I have been taking pictures of Ellie in her new outfits!   I bought Ellie some new sunglasses called "babiators" ha.

 

4 Months with Ellie

Before starting my 4 month update I just wanted to send out some big hugs to fellow blogger ChickinNH.  I am not sure if you are reading other people's blogs lately, but I want you to know we are thinking about you and your family and praying for you. 

Talking changes/development

The giggles...oh how I love the giggles!  To hear Ellie laugh is probably the most amazing thing ever.  This month has brought on increased smiles and laughter from our little one.  I can see that her core is starting to get stronger too.  She doesn't like to be held facing in as much - she wants to face outward so that she can see the world.  She notices things a lot more now - will turn to look at people, Winnie and toys.  

She rolled from her stomach to her back a few times this month and she has been kicking her legs a lot more. 

Working Mom

Work...aye this working mom thing is quite the challenge.  It is hard to live in both of these worlds at the same time - having both compete for my time, thoughts and energy.  I love that my job is flexible and allows me to work 2 days from home with Ellie, but it is so very difficult to manage both at the same time.  I am hoping that things are just crazy right now because it is an unusually busy time at work and that maybe during the spring time I won't feel guilty about taking Ellie and Winnie out for a walk or an errand during the days I am home.  

I had lunch with my old boss last week and that has helped me think about work life balance a lot.  When she was my boss she worked part time and was in the office 3 days a week.  What it comes back to overall for me is that I don't want to look back in a year and think "I didn't take the time to do x or y with Ellie on that nice spring day when the sun was out" I don't know if I will ever be able to have another child and this could be my only chance to experience things - I don't want to miss anything!  But then at the same time I still need to get my work done!

Sleep

Ellie is still a sleeping champ.  It is unusual for her to wake up in the middle of the night now, but she still does that occasionally.  Her normal go to bed time is around 8pm now, but sometimes she doesn't fall asleep until 9pm.  Brian's job is to put her to bed and he walks around with her and feeds her from the bottle and then lays her down in her rock n play.  Sometimes she will wake up after he has put her down and he will have to go back in and rock her some more. 

Usually once she is really out she will sleep until 6:20ish am.  If she wakes up at this time I go in and feed her then reswaddle her and put her back to bed.  She usually goes back to sleep until about 7:30 am.  Sometimes she wants to keep sleeping on my work days and I have to wake her up booo.  

My favorite time of day is when I go back in for the second wake up at 7:30.  I unwrap Ellie's swaddle and lay her in her crib and she lets out big "stretchies" and then gives me a big smile.  

Feeding

Feeding has gotten pretty straight forward.  When I am at home with her she usually eats every 2-3 hours.  When I am not working I breastfeed her all day except after 7 pm ish when she gets a bottle due to how fussy she gets!  Most of the time Ellie is great at latching and focusing on eating instead of looking around. 

I feel like I pump a lot because on days I am not working I usually pump once in the morning when I wake up (just one side) and then I pump both sides before I go to sleep.  On days when I am working I pump 4 times a day (2 at home/2 at work) so taking out the pump and the parts is quite tedious to do that many times a day, but I do it to make sure I have enough milk to get her bottles and to make sure my breasts don't explode/leak overnight! 

Body

I am hovering around being down 11-12 lbs from my pre-pregnancy weight.  It is nice to fit into things I haven't fit into in a while, but I am finding a lot of my work clothes are almost too loose (nice problem to have).  It will be interesting to see how my summer clothes are fitting if spring/summer ever comes to New England this year!

The scale is about 1-2 lbs away from a new weight "decade" as I call it.  I haven't seen 12X since high school so I am somewhat interested in seeing if I can make that happen.  

Brian and I visited his parents in PA last weekend and on Saturday morning we left Ellie with Grandpa and Granny and took Winnie on a 5 mile run.  It wasn't the fastest run, but it felt SO good to be running.  We joked that we were on a "Date" besides the fact that Winnie was there. 

Feelings/thoughts
I will be honest with you that I cried a lot this week.  Not because I was sad for me, but because I was sad for my blog friend ChickinNH.  I haven't cried that much probably since we were doing IF treatments.  What she is going through breaks my heart into pieces.  It isn't fair for anyone to lose a child in that way, not to mention someone who has already been through so much to get pregnant to begin with.  I hope and pray that she and her husband are able to heel and are able to get their bring home baby soon.  

When I start to get annoyed that Ellie is fussing or crying I think about Chickie and others who would be so thankful to have a crying baby to soothe and that really makes me appreciate how fortunate we have been. 
 

3 Months With Ellie

I love seeing Ellie's progression in these pictures.  She is wearing the same onesie in all of them and you can see how she fills it out so much more in the 3 month photo!  Also she doesn't slump over as much in the most recent photo!

Talking changes/development

The first few months Ellie was mostly making squeaky noises, but in the last month she has started to coo, babble and even laugh.  These noises are much better than just the squeaks and cries we used to get!  I love hearing her produce new sounds!

She has started to hold onto toys when you put them in her hand and she seems to actually look at the pictures when i read her books.  She even started to use her hand to turn the page! She notices faces a lot more and will look at Winnie when she is close enough. Winnie usually steals our socks and carries them around the house with her, but lately she has switched over to baby burp clothes...I am hoping this means she loves baby Ellie more than the smell of our feet! Tummy time is getting a little longer and she likes to hang out on her mat on her back and knock around the hanging toys.  

Smiles are coming a lot more frequently now and if you smile at her (at least when she is in a good mood) she will smile back at you - which is the best thing ever!  I love the mornings when she is stretching out after being swaddled all night and she makes coos and smiles at me!

Back to work

I started back at work about a week and a half ago.  It is both a good and a bad thing I would say.  I am only in the office on Mondays, Wednesdays and Thursdays and then I work from home (with Ellie around) on Tuesdays and Fridays.  It is really tough trying to get work done from home with a 3 month around to take care of.  I try to fit in work when she naps but I inevitably feel like I am failing at two jobs at once.  If I am doing work then I feel like I am neglecting her and then if I am playing with her I feel like I am neglecting work.  

Originally my plan was to go reduced hours and not work on Tuesdays and Fridays but my bossed convinced me to stay full time and do a "flexible schedule" on the days I am home with her.  I am still in a trial period of it, so we shall see how it works out.  I have a feeling he wanted me to stay full time because that way our group doesn't lose any money from the budget and he also probably knew I would end up doing all my work anyway even if i was part time so might as well pay me for it.  I just try to be as efficient as possible on the days I am in the office and hopefully that will take some of the edge off the days I am at home. 

Pumping at work has been interesting.  Luckily we have a nursing room at work that is on my floor - on my first day I had to sign up for my 30 minute time slots during the day.  It is nice to have a set time, but if people schedule meetings over my time slot it gets a little tricky to fit in the pumping.  Currently I try to pump 3 times while at work to make sure my supply doesn't go down, but I am hoping to eventually reduce it to twice at work. To pass the time while I pump I have started doing squats!  Ha you have to try to fit in exercise where you can these days!

My days at work have been really busy, which makes them go by fast, but I am afraid it will be tough to balance the expectations with making sure I get home early for Ellie, etc.  People have asked me if it was tough to leave her on the first day/week, but it wasn't too bad.  She was asleep when I dropped her off so that helped, and plus she is with my mom the 3 days I am at work so that helps too.  My mom is awesome at taking care of kids so I have no worries about leaving her there.  My mom worked in early education most of her life so she knows whats up. 

Sleep
Ellie has been consistently good at sleeping lately.  She goes to bed between 8:30-9:15pm and usually wakes up between 5:30-6:15 am.  This works out well for me getting ready in the morning because she wakes up, I feed her and then she goes back to sleep  until about 7:30am.  This allows me time to get ready, feed Winnie, etc.  Brian leaves for work most mornings at 5:40 am so I am usually on my own in the morning.  

She isn't a great day time napper yet.  She catnaps throughout the day and if I let her sleep on me in the afternoon she may put in a 1-2 hour nap (but only on top of me, ha).  I hope as she gets a little older naps will become more predictable and longer.  

Feeding

Breastfeeding is still going strong!  I do pump a lot more now that I am back at work, which is annoying, but it is what it is.  When I do breastfeed her she is a champ now and it is pretty effortless through most of the day.  The only time it gets tricky is at night (6-8pm) when she gets fussy.  We usually give her a bottle then to make sure she gets enough food in before bed. 

Breastfeeding was a challenge at the beginning, but I am glad I have stuck with it.  It can still be a challenge if I want to go out for more than 2 hours, because then she would need a bottle and I might need to pump. 

Body
 I am still down about 10 lbs from my pregnancy weight.  I am starting to feel bad that I haven't worked out much since giving birth - I think I need to get into my work groove a bit before adding that on right now.  I still consider breastfeeding my "workout" right now since it does burn a lot of calories. I will continue to try to fit in some strength training (such as while I pump) and I hope when the nice weather comes I will be able to get out for more frequent and longer walks. 

Feelings/thoughts
 Brian had to travel for work this week for 2 nights.  It was quite a challenge being home by myself with Ellie for 2 nights and I hope he doesn't have to travel for more than that.  It was mostly the fact that there was nobody else to "hand her off to" when I needed to do something.  We made it through though!  

I find Brian and I saying things like "i can't wait for her to do this or that" and I try not to say things like that too frequently because I really do want to enjoy the stage/moment that Ellie is at right now.  I have started to put away some of her newborn clothes that she has out grown and it makes me a little sad because she will never be that small again!  And who knows if we will be able to have another baby to wear the clothes. 

Are You Sure That Baby Is Yours?

Sometimes I wonder if this baby really belongs to Brian and I.  Case in point: Brian and I are not great sleepers.  Me especially.  I had some lovely insomnia while I was pregnant pretty much covering both the second and third trimesters.  I can't take naps, I can't sleep in.  But somehow we seem to be blessed with a child that is a good sleeper.  

Whenever I read our baby books on how long Ellie should be sleeping at 2-3 months they all say that she could be doing a 4 hour stretch at a time.  Last night Ellie slept from 9:30pm until 6:00 am! She woke up, I fed her and she seemed sleepy so I put her back to bed and she slept for another 1.5 hours.  Where did she come from??  She doesn't do this every night - most nights she is up between 3-4 am, but she has given us a lot of these nights where she wakes up at 5 am + and it is wonderful.  I would never have expected her to sleep so well and I am very grateful. 

She isn't quite as good at napping during the day - which leads to some fussiness from 5-8pm, but she doesn't seem to have trouble sleeping at night.  

Having written this all down I am probably shooting myself in the foot and she will start waking up every 3 hours :)

 In other fun baby news, Ellie attended her first movie!  In a local theater they run a weekly "Baby Matinee" where you can bring your baby to the movie!  We saw 12 Years a Slave and I was very thankful Ellie can't understand things yet, because that move was heavy.  It was funny being in the movie theater with babies, every now and then one would "erupt" but other moms were good at quieting the babies down quickly, so I was able to follow the movie for the most part.  

We are hoping to take Ellie on her first road trip this weekend to visit Brian's parents, sister and his friends in Pennsylvania.  Right now his parents don't have power due to an ice storm so hopefully they get it back today so we can still go down. 

Here are some recent pics of our cutie!

 

 

 

2 Months with Ellie

2 Months have gone by! Wowzer

Sleep
Sleep has improved dramatically from 1 month, but it is still far from predictable.  Most nights she is going from 10 pm until 3:30 am and then up for good at 7 am.  Some nights she doesn't get to sleep until 11 pm and may sleep until 4 or even 5 am, then go back to sleep until maybe 7:30/8 am.  A couple of times she has slept until 6 am - I think maybe twice.  

Feeding
Breastfeeding has been going well.  I am trying different things to stretch out her feedings a bit since during the day she might want to eat every 1/1.5 hours at some points, which seems really frequent for 2 months.  I think part of it might be that she isn't always hungry, rather she might be tired, etc and I am misinterpreting her signals.  I am trying different things (see book review below).  

She nurses fine during the day, but at around 5 pm she starts getting really fussy and it gets very hard to breastfeed her.  She eats for a minute then pops off my breast crying.  She does this over and over again.  What we have been doing is bottle feeding her breast milk at night and this seems to be helping.  I will give her a 2/2.5 oz bottle at 6ish then Brian will give her a bottle around 8:30ish and this also helps to get more milk into her to help her sleep longer (I think). 

Body
I have been feeling pretty good lately now that I am usually only getting up once per night, which is a very manageable schedule for me (we shall see how this feels when I start back with work).  I am down about 10lbs below my pre-pregnancy weight and I am actually fitting into clothes that didn't fit me before I got pregnant - who would have thunk it? My body has changed a bit though, my stomach is smaller than before, but is looser - the skin doesn't really sag in my mid section, but definitely feels looser and Brian said the same thing. I think that with some exercise I will be able to tone it up a bit, at least I hope so. 

 I have not really done much exercise since I have been cleared to do so at 6 weeks because I seem to be loosing weight without it and I don't want to exhaust my body too much at this point. I am looking forward to taking a lot of walks with Ellie and Winnie once the weather gets nicer (although it is currently like 10 degrees here now, so the nice weather seems very far away!).

Brian and I gave the "bed dance" another go around, but unfortunately I had to stop because it hurt too much.  I am still feeling a lot of pinching down there when we do it and I am not sure if this is something we need to work out together or will be resolved with more time and healing.  I also spotted a bit again this time. It is a bit frustrating not to be back to normal yet and to have to restrict things, hopefully it will resolve soon.

Developments
I was getting nervous because in all of the baby books I was reading they would say that the baby would start to "socially smile" around 6 weeks, but I hadn't seen a "real smile" from Ellie at this point. We had only seen gas smiles or poop smiles at this point.  Around 7 weeks I am happy to report that she found her smile and it is the best thing!  Now we can smile at her and most of the time (if she is in a good mood) she smiles back. 

Her neck is also getting much stronger - she can't fully support it yet, but she can pick it up higher and for longer periods of time when she does tummy time. Her vision has also changed a lot too - she used to just stare out into the distance and look a bit cross eyed, but now she can focus on things and is beginning to follow items with her eyes.   

Field Trip
I am still on maternity leave until February 17th, but I took Ellie in to work so everyone could see her.  I work in the finance department at work and every month we have "cake day" to celebrate the birthdays of the month.  I figured this would be a nice opportunity to stop by and get to see everyone at once.  One of the women I manage had a baby the week before I did so I coordinated with her so that she would also bring her baby to work that day.  

It felt a little odd to be driving to work and even more odd doing it with a baby.  It felt good to see my coworkers and I am glad they got to meet Ellie and I got the chance to meet my coworkers baby.  

Book review
My cousin lent me the book "The 90 Minute Baby Sleep Program" and I am trying it out this week.  It talks about how babies (and adults) have 90 minute sleep rhythms and that babies will have 90 minutes of awake time then will probably need a nap.  I will report back on how it works out!

 
Feelings/Thoughts
Sometimes people ask me if anything has surprised me about being a mother.  One of the biggest things is a feeling of not being complete when I am out without Ellie.  I think it is because since she was born I haven't spent more than 3 hours away from her and when I am out without her I am constantly looking around for her!  It is like I go from wanting some time to myself, but then when I get it I immediately want to go and pick her up again!

Also I had no real idea of how hard it would be to get things done with a baby.  My cousin had told me that things take so much longer, but until living it I didn't really understand why.  It is like a constant carousel of feeding, changing, rocking, etc that seems to make the day get away from me!  I try to say to myself things like "wow you did 2 loads of laundry today" to make myself feel better ;)

Brian and I were commenting the other day how we probably end up kissing Ellie on her head about 100 times a day (each) she is just so snuggleable right now that is hard not to.  

More About Sleep (and other things)

By some miracle on Sunday night Ellie slept from 10:15pm until 6:15 am.  That is right folks - she slept 8 hour straight!  I could not believe it.  I of course did not sleep 8 hours straight because I was staring at the monitor waiting for her to wake up! The following night she slept 10:15-5am.  Not too shabby!  Only problem was that at 5 am she was bright eyed and would not go back to sleep, but hey I can't blame her after sleeping for 7 hours. Sadly last night she woke up at about 2:45 am then again at 7 am so we did a bit of regression. 

The good thing is that I know she has it in her to sleep a full night, so when she decides to do it for a night it will be a blessing/treat for mom and dad.  

I was debating whether or not to write this here, but I decided to go ahead since I am using this blog for documenting the journey purposes!  After my 6 week OB appointment, DH and I had sex for the first time since Ellie was born! We had been doing the bed dance up until I was induced, not as frequently as before I was pregnant, but I was proud of us for still "getting jiggy with it" at 9 months pregnant! 

I was a bit nervous about getting back at it since I tore a little when Ellie was born and had a few stitches and I spotted a bit after my 6 week post partum visit.  Overall it was a bit uncomfortable, but still enjoyable!  I felt a bit of pinching during it, which I hope will go away with repeated use!  

Ok that is all you are getting out of me!  

The Sleep Gods have smiled on me

I wanted to put this down in writing.  Last night Ellie slept from 10 pm until 3:30 am!  It isn't sleeping through the night, but it was 5.5 hours! Then I got her back to sleep at 4:30 am and she slept until 8:20 am.  Wow that was some great sleeping - she just turned 6 weeks old. 

The only problem with the long stretches is that my boobs start to leak like crazy after about 4 hours.  The doctor said that will eventually go away as my breasts won't hold all the milk, rather they will make milk on demand instead.  

Also I am becoming more comfortable taking her out on errands with me.  I went grocery shopping with her in the bjorn carrier and it worked out really well.