**Warning: Don't read if you are having a bad IF day**

CD52

First let's start with a picture of Ellie:

I thought about not putting this out there, but I had to tell my blog friends and I am pretty sure nobody I know in "real" life reads my blog, at least I hope they don't!  If you actually know me in real life please don't say anything!

Last night I got home from work and said to myself "I haven't taken a pregnancy test in over a week, I should just check."  After my initial testing like every other day earlier this cycle I had slowly resolved myself to taking a test every week (like you are supposed to, not like crazy POAS people like me usually end up doing).  I figured since this is my first postpartum period that it would likely be really long or I would only get 1 period and have to go back to the RE.  Not.so.much. 

To my utter amazement after about 2 minutes after POAS, I look down to see this:

I was 1) shocked that the test was positive and 2) shocked at how dark the second line was.  I literally looked down at the test and said "no F***ing way."  Pretty much any time I have taken a pregnancy test I expect it to be positive - but the two times I have seen positive tests have completely blindsided me. I had absolutely no idea that I would see a positive test.  When I found out I was pregnant with Ellie I also found out using a Wondfo, but the line was so light that I had to stare at it all day long to make sure it was there.  There is no mistaking this line!

So all this is going down as Ellie is eating her dinner and Brian isn't home from work yet.  I run around the house and find two white shirts and write "big sister" on Ellie's and "Biggest Sister" on Winnie's (yes I put a shirt on my dog).  I tried to get them to sit next to each other so I could snap a picture but of course they wanted no part of this so I took a video of them.  I knew Brian would be coming home after Ellie went to bed so I needed something to show him.  

Brian comes home and I am very nonchalant, I tell him I have the cutest video of Ellie and Winnie to show him after he gets changed into his leisure wear. So he comes back down stairs and I hand him my phone with the video and he watches it and says "wow you had some extra time when you got home today" (he has no idea what the video is about even though you can clearly read the shirts) So I say "did you see what the shirts said? Big Sister, Biggest Sister?" and he says "yes" and I say "do you know why they say that?" (seriously I couldn't believe it took him so long to catch on) and finally I see it has clicked!  He is super surprised and gives me a giant hug.  

We are both in shock and our minds are racing about "what does this mean" (example: we are about to put an addition on our house and the process should take 6 months and if we stick to the original plan timing the edition won't be done by the time the baby is here).

I am trying to back track into when I actually ovulated this cycle and it is a bit tricky to figure out.  Based on Fertility Friend (I wasn't temping, just charting BDing, and CM) it looks like I O'd around CD35.  That would explain why the test I took last week at 10DPO was negative, but I have such a dark line now.  I put in a call to the OB to see if they need me to come in earlier than my annual appointment on Feb 5th.  It is so weird to go right to the OB and not the RE. 

Right now my mind is racing. I barely slept last night thinking about:

*How is the baby doing?  

*Is something going to go wrong?  Seriously how am I this lucky, something is going to go wrong.

*How will we manage having kids 22 months apart.

*Winnie is going to be pissed we did this to her again.

*Will I need to wean Ellie quickly?

*And like 1 million other things. 

So that is all I have for now. I will update when I have something - perhaps a beta.