Please no cysts

CD25

One more week – I can make it without testing right?  Of course I can.  So last night and this morning I had a bit of cramping that feels like it is in my ovaries so I am really praying that it isn’t due to cysts in there.  The only thing worse than getting a BFN is getting a BFN along with cysts that force you to sit out a cycle! 

Other than that the week is going well.  I have training class with my pup Winnie tonight so hopefully today and tonight will fly by. I am enjoying my decaf cup of hazelnut coffee right now with some homemade applesauce. Yum it feels like fall.  I am pretty sure that if this month is a BFN I am going to drink a sh!t load of coffee.  I think I miss coffee more than wine, but it is a close call.  I know I am being overly cautious, but at least I can say that I tried!

Waiting and Hoping

CD24

My birthday on Saturday was a blast.  We went to a local ice cream stand/farm with some friends and ate ice cream, played mini golf and rode some bumper boats – I had way too much fun on my 31^st birthday.  Here is a picture of what is left of my crazy birthday cake. 

I wish I could say that all of the birthday fun has kept my mind off the 2 ww but that is just not the case.  Of course I am thinking every cramp is implantation at this point.  Last night I was a little crampy before bed – but that is the only phantom symptom for now.  DH asked me yesterday if I will be really disappointed if this cycle doesn’t work.  I told him that right now I am letting myself be optimistic, as we get closer to beta day I will try to focus on the fact that it will most likely be negative.  Hopefully that will make me less sad when it is, but that is wishful thinking. 

My beta day is coming at a very busy work day and week for me so if it is negative I can dive back into my work and pray the red she devil shows up soon.  If it is positive then I am sure my work will suffer because I won’t be able to pay attention to it!

Happy Birthday to me

CD22

Today is my 31st birthday.  Honestly back when we got married 3 years ago I had hoped to be pregnant by this point - but some times things don't work out exactly as you plan.  I am hoping, however, that even though I don't know for sure that I am pregnant that perhaps there is a chance that I might be.  

My temps this morning have continued to stay up which gives me hope that I did ovulate this cycle, which would be progress in itself.  FF keeps moving my O date though, but at least it moved it to a better day - at first it looked like I O'd early and now it shows it the day after my IUI.  Not sure how accurate the specific results from FF are, but as long as it thinks I O'd at some point I am happy.  

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Love is in the Air

CD20

Yesterday was DH and my 3^rd wedding anniversary!  Although seeing 3 years does not really seem like that much to me since we have been together for nearly 12 years.  We made ourselves a nice dinner at home since we went out on Monday for DH’s birthday dinner. (see below puppy cupcakes I made him)

 He got me some beautiful roses for our anniversary.  Over dinner we chatted about how great it would be if this cycle worked.  

I have been successful in not peeing on anything so I hope that trend continues!  I know it will get harder as we get closer to the beta day – but I was talking to my mom on the phone last night and she reminded me how awful it would be to get a false positive from the trigger shot or to get a positive then the beta doesn’t turn out well.  I just have to keep myself busy!

Fertility Friend is still giving me cross hairs on CD 17 even though we did the IUI on CD18.  I am also still having very wet cervical fluid which makes me nervous that I didn’t ovulate.  I am going to try to ignore these and put more faith in the RE and the trigger shot working since I am not doing any mid cycle blood work to confirm ovulation. 

Should I even keep temping?

CD19

I have kept up with temping even though I am on a monitored cycle.  I just like to keep up with it to see what is going on – helps me with headaches, meds, etc.  I know people say that medicated cycles can mess with your temps though.  I am nervous about the way my chart is looking just the same.  FF gave me cross hairs on CD15 which can’t be right because I had an u/s on that day and my biggest follie was 15.8 – so most likely wouldn’t have ovulated on my own. 

I triggered on Sunday night and had IUI yesterday and I am stilling having pretty watery CM.  I guess I am just nervous that the trigger shot didn’t make me ovulate and that I still haven’t ovulated.  I am not sure if that is possible, but makes me extremely nervous.  I wish the RE did an u/s on the day of the IUI to double check how big the follies were. 

I of course have been imagining telling people that I am pregnant and I really need to reel in it.  Things are getting busy at work over the next few weeks so hopefully that will help!